you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
