You can't special order awesome
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
