So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
