We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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