doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
