i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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