You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
