PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
