I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
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