I want to make a zoo with you.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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