Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
