do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
