New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
