Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize