He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
