the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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