Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
