Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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