I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
