I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize