If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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