Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
tell me about the fingering
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