We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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