One girl and one boy is just not enough.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
They have beer where we have blood.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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