i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
