talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
