Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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