Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
