wrigley field is MILF paradise
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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