When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
FUCK WHALES
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
