I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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