Just fell off a train. Bad.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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