At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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