what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles