Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
