the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize