Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
