So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Screwed.edu
do herpes really smell.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
