Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
