idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
