cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
