why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
