is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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