he wants to bone in the snuggie
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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