that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
