I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
