Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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