ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
