trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Randomize
