I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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