so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.