think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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